Saturday, August 22, 2009

Family Ties



The weekend reconciliation meeting with my parents is done and dusted. And it went off without a hitch. There was no stress, nobody feeling out of place or akward. No talking about the past (in a bad way), just a lot of talking about the missing years and the good stuff from the past when were still a family.

It was very weird, because it wasn't weird. It was like we had only seen or spoken to each other a few days ago. There was lots of laughter, smiles, happiness and even a few tears. There were hugs and I love you's and generally just a family who had missed out on many years and who had no interest in the past, just in building the future.

I told my mother I loved her. She told me she loved me too. It was the first time I could actually remember telling her and meaning it. It was the first time I could remember her saying it back and it feeling wonderful.

She's not an over affectionate woman my mum. Where as I am. She hasn't changed. She is still the mum that I remember. Blunt and to the point, no mucking around and no bullshit. And I think I am at a point in my life where I can accept that and appreciate this amazing woman for who she is. I never thought of myself as anything like her, but after the weekend, I can see much of her in myself and its all the good stuff.

My relationship with my dad is going to be a tiny bit harder to cement I think. But I expected that and I am not afraid of the hard work that it will entail. I happen to think that it is worth it and if I can win back the respect of both my parents then I will be a happy and fullfilled woman.

My children were thrilled to see not only their aunt and their cousin, but also my sisters wife and their grandparents. My parents were equally as thrilled. It was so awesome to watch my youngest daughter throw herself at her grandparents and hug them like she wanted to squeeze the stuffing out of them. My middle daughter was just as happy, although she seemed a little reserved at the beginning. She soon warmed up to them and the chatter just never stopped.

Something that my mother did for me on the weekend, bought tears to my eyes. She has always kept everything to do with our lives from the day we were born and she brought down my baby scrapbook and sent it home with me. I don't mind admitting that I shed a tear or two when I read the names in some of the cards. People I hadn't seen for years, some that were no longer with us and others that I still kept in contact with.

That gesture, to me, cemented the fact that my family is slowly, piece by piece, rebuilding itself and there is no doubt in my mind that this will happen in its own time and none of us are in a hurry to push it and make it happen any faster than it is. Slow and steady wins the race. And that's the way that we are taking it.

I also left there with a beautiful plant from my mother which now takes pride of place on my kitchen bench. I had made her and my dad a scrapbook full of photos of the children and their great grand daughter. They were thrilled with it and I told them that the empty parts of the album were for future get together and new memories that I have no doubt we will make.

Thankyou to everyone who supported me through this. Especially to Lia and Rae, when both these ladies lost their mummys, it really spurred me into action and I will be forever grateful to them for their love and support.

I'll leave you with some photo's of the day....
















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Friday, August 21, 2009

Family Ties

For some reason, stupid ass blogger wont let me post my pics of my reunion with my family.

So, you'll find them over HERE.

I've left the post open, so no doubt the psycho bitch from hell will be over there sticky nosing, but I hope she enjoys seeing me so happy. Shame that's something she'll never have.

xox
Posted by Lisa Jane :: 9:07 PM :: 0 Comments:

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Saturday, August 15, 2009

Moving Along At A Cracking Pace



My inner sugar bitch has been out in full force lately and I can't seem to stop her. I wake up in the morning and the first thing I crave is sugar. So off I go on hunt for sugar which usually results in me eating a small piece of chocolate which, of course, isn't an ideal breakfast.

Dori suggested some evening primrose oil, so I am off in the morning to get some and see if that helps. Anything is better than sabotaging all the work that I have done so far.

The scales are sitting steady at 97.2kg, so I am happy with that. For now! My next goal is to get to 80 kilos soon. I'm not sure what I want to get to by christmas, so I think I might aim for 85kgs. Depending on the speed that it comes off I may aim for the 70's.

I'm tucked up in bed tonight watching boring stuff on foxtel. I've posted over on my other blog, but I knew I needed to update over here too on my health and fitness goals.

Training has been sporadic of late, due to the fact that every second weekend we have our boys, and the rest of the week Michael is flat out at work. He is usually so emotionally drained by the time he gets home that sometimes he is just to exhausted to go. I could probably go without him during the day. But its one of the only times we get to be together and actually spend time together alone.

My cardio is still going strong and I'm finding that I am actually enjoying it. I pre-record lots of episodes of Judge Judy on foxtel and peddle on the bike for an hour whilst watching her rip of a whole group of people a new asshole.

Michael and I have made a promise to each other, that no matter how tired we are, we will go to the gym and train hard four days/nights a week. I'm not going to reach my goals any quicker if we are having days off here and there. And sometimes I need to motivate him a little too.

I'm looking for new healthy recipes on the net of late, so if anybody has any or knows of any, please feel free to leave the links in my comments or email me at lisajane@hisbliss.com.

It's again been bought to my attention that the ex monster is STILL reading here. I don't know what she thinks she will find, but hey, if reading about me losing weight is what floats her boat then she can go for it. From what I've seen of late, all the weight I've lost (which is over 20kg's) seems to have hit her ass. So that makes me giggle with glee.

Tomorrow is the big day with my folks, so I am going to try to go to the gym after we get home. Even if it is only for a quick work out.

Right now? I'm going to watch some trashy, meaningless tv and try to relax.
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Saturday, August 8, 2009

I'm Back!




This post is over at http://hisbliss.com due to the personal nature of it. If you want the password, it is over at the forum under my LJ post or you can email me at here and I will share it with you.

Scales are down another 300 grams to 97.3kgs.

I promise more of an update, but right now head over to the other blog and check out the huge update there.
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